There’s more to visiting the South than grits and magnolias. If you want to truly fit in, understanding Southern etiquette is key. Politeness isn’t optional here—it’s the social glue that keeps front porches full, church potlucks bustling, and guests feeling like kin.
Whether you’re exploring Savannah, Nashville, or a quiet corner of Mississippi, these timeless manners will ensure you blend in beautifully. Especially if you’re staying with a Southern family, this guide will help you show appreciation, speak with grace, and leave a trail of thank-you notes in your wake.
11 Essential Rules of Southern Etiquette
1. Mind Your Manners, Sugar
Southern hospitality starts with politeness. These basics go a long way:
- Say “Yes, ma’am” and “No, sir.” It’s not about age—it’s about respect.
- Always say “please” and “thank you.” Even for the little things.
- Hold the door open. For everyone.
- Smile and greet people. Whether you know them or not.
A friendly hello to a stranger is expected, not awkward. In fact, it’s rude not to acknowledge someone with a nod or a smile.
2. Don’t Rush It
Southerners are unhurried by design. Meals, conversations, and even errands take their time.
- Practice patience. You’ll rarely hear someone say, “Let’s get this over with.”
- Linger a little. If someone invites you to sit a spell, do it.
- Avoid interrupting. Let folks finish their story, even if it wanders.
Pacing is part of the experience. Learn to savor moments, not just cross them off.
3. Dress the Part
Yes, it’s hot. But flip-flops and short shorts don’t fly everywhere.
- Sunday best still matters. Especially for church, dinner out, or special occasions.
- No hats indoors. Take it off when you enter someone’s home.
- Casual doesn’t mean sloppy. Put together and polite go hand-in-hand.
Want to look like a local? Clean, crisp, and respectful wins every time.
4. Tips for Staying with a Southern Family
If you’ve been invited to stay in someone’s home, consider it an honor. Southern families treat guests like royalty, and a little courtesy in return will make everyone feel comfortable.
Bring a Gift
Don’t show up empty-handed. Consider:
- Local treats from your hometown
- Fresh flowers or a small candle
- A thank-you card tucked into your bag
Offer to Help
Even if they wave you off, it’s good manners to offer:
- “Can I help set the table?”
- “Mind if I clear the dishes?”
- “Would you like help walking the dog?”
Keep Common Areas Tidy
- Make your bed.
- Don’t leave clothes in the bathroom.
- Wipe down the sink or countertop if you make a mess.
Communicate Your Schedule
- Let your hosts know if you’ll be out late.
- Be clear about dietary restrictions ahead of time.
- Say thank you every single day. Seriously.
5. Bonus Tips for Students and Interns Staying in the South
For young college students, especially those from outside the region, these extra tips will help you stand out for all the right reasons—without repeating what’s already been said.
Be Respectful with Your Words
- Use “ma’am” and “sir” with adults and supervisors.
- Say “excuse me” and “pardon me” instead of “what?” or “huh?”
Show Thoughtful Independence
- Respect house rules—ask about curfews, shared spaces, or chores.
- Don’t assume anything is self-serve. Ask before helping yourself to food or supplies.
Communicate Clearly and Considerately
- Let your hosts know if you’ll be home late or missing a meal.
- Ask ahead of time if you’d like to invite someone over.
- Keep your personal items tidy and shared spaces clean.
Going Out with Friends?
- Text or call if plans change—especially if you’ll be late.
- Avoid loud entrances if returning late.
- Never bring guests back unannounced—it’s considered rude.
Say a Proper Thank You
- A handwritten note shows genuine appreciation.
- Mention something personal: “I’ll always remember the peach cobbler and porch talks.”
- A handwritten note goes a long way.
- Mention specific memories—“I’ll never forget your mama’s cornbread.”
6. Food Is Love, So Eat Up
In the South, food is sacred—and sharing it is an act of love.
- Try what’s served. Even if you’ve never had fried green tomatoes before.
- Compliment the cook. Even if it’s just biscuits from a can.
- Don’t waste. A clean plate is the highest compliment.
And yes, say grace when asked. Even if you don’t usually, bowing your head in respect is enough.
7. Show Gratitude Loud and Clear
You may hear “Oh, it’s nothing!” when someone does something kind—but you better believe it meant something.
- Send a handwritten thank-you note. Not a text.
- Follow up with a message after your visit. Mention something specific you enjoyed.
- Share your memories. “I still think about your mama’s cornbread!” goes a long way.
8. Mind the Boundaries
Southerners are friendly but value privacy.
- Ask before taking photos of someone’s home or property.
- Don’t assume you can open the fridge.
- Keep your voice down in quiet spaces.
Respect is central to Southern living. Kindness and consideration should lead every action.
Final Thoughts: More Than Manners
Southern etiquette isn’t about rules—it’s about relationships. It’s how we show love, extend grace, and welcome the world with open arms.
Follow these tips and you won’t just fit in—you’ll be remembered.
As we say around here, make yourself at home. Just don’t forget to write your thank-yous before you leave.u leave.
